is wine microwaveable?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize