I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Randomize
