I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
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It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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