Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
