well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize