I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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