Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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