just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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