Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
