I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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