I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize