A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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