This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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