I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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