I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
