I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
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