There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
