I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize