Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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