I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
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I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
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i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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