Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
