Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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