So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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