don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
