My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Randomize