Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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