I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Buhtt sex?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
