All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize