OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
