Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
My pussy is not your playground.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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