you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
