so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
