dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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