when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
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In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
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I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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