we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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