i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
you told grandpa to call you daddy
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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