totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
