I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
