Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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