I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
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