K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
