Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
