We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
