It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
soo... how was my night?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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