Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You made out with two different species that night
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
try to milk me bitch
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