Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
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ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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