remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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