I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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