I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
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