i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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